done.

half a year and just 5 posts.
and 5 posts isn't a continuance,
it's actually the ending

but as all things, there's always a will to it,
there's always exit stage left once the lights dim,
and there's always a sense that all things come to pass

so i'll end this with four excerpts from
a moving, disturbing and powerful story,
"the perks of being a wallflower" by stephen chbosky

...until then.

four

i'm not sure if i will have the time to write
anymore letters because i might be
too busy trying to ''participate''

so, if this does end up being my last letter,
please believe that things are good with me

and even when they're not,
they will be soon enough

...and i will believe the same about you.

three.

and later that night to be with my family at dinnertime
and have things just be like they always were.
that was the amazing part

things just keep going.
we didn't talk about anything heavy or light.
we were just there together

...and that was enough

two.

so i guess we are who we are for a number of reasons.
and maybe we'll never know most of them

but even if we don't have the power to choose where we come from,
we can still choose where we go from there.
we can still do things

...and we can try to feel ok about them

one.

and (i would have to blame) God for not stopping all this
and things that are much worse.
and i did do that for a while, but then i just couldn't anymore

because it wasn't going anywhere

...because it wasn't the point

seven.

i can't believe it's been 7 years

i remember wanting it so much,
i remember feeling so scared,
and i remember feeling so hopeful

and now i've achieved that

i feel really contented,
i feel really blessed,
and i feel really grateful

it's been 7 years. how about that?

fuck one-way streets.

newsflash!

here's something for you to realize.
if people are nasty to you for no reason,
don't tolerate it. whatsoever.

you don't have to understand.
you don't have to justify their actions.
you don't have to accept it.

sure, you might wanna understand
their plight and say to yourself;
"...they're just having a bad day..."

you might wanna justify their actions
and try to convince yourself;
"...they're just venting frustations..."

and you might wanna end up
trying to convince yourself;
"...it's ok, i can accept it..."

don't.

why the fuck should we be the ones to suffer?
why the fuck should we tolerate crap like that?
why the fuck should we be treated like shit?

if you don't deserve to be treated that way,
if you're the one who always ends up understanding
and justifying the shitty amount of mutual respect

then here's a newsflash for you; you don't have to.

at the end of the day;
you're worth someone's respect,
and some people are worth it

...most people aren't.