betol ahhh siottt

okay, here's something we should all experience
at least once in our lifetime;

a rempit date

that's right ladies and gentlemen,
a date which consists of wooing a rempit-ish gal
and having rempit-ish conversations

now, the wooing part is quite easy.
you start off by going for 'the look'!

...and it starts by not showering for 3 days
and getting out of bed straightaway

what you would need is some crummy t-shirt
which you take out of the laundry basket
and terus pakai tak payah iron segale

next thing you would need is to invest
in the tried and trusted accessories,
which includes jeans yang sangat ketat
until you feel as if your eyes will pop out,
belts with lotsa 'steel' on it, for that rugged look,
and last but not least the tackiest-looking sneakers

now, the 2nd part is the wooing part,
which, under normal circumstances would be tough,
but not in this case ladies and gentlemen,
as you would only need to practice a basic skill;

...making kiss kiss* sounds to total strangers!

in no time you'll be bagging lotsa phone numbers,
since apparently you don't even need a personality,
just the courage to make annoying kiss kiss sounds

now, the final part would be the date part itself.
steer clear of classy, high-priced restaurants
and go for the more run-down basic food outlets,
since, well, we all know noodles taste the same everywhere

now, to win her heart, do not forget to
go for engaging and mind-blowing topics of conversation.
one of which, is illustrated here;

"...weeyyy arituuu beb, aku nampak kambing
masok longkang ah weyyy, gempak weyyy..."

and sooner rather than later you would be
looked upon with dreamy eyes and the promise of true love

so there you go people, rempit dates.
it's the ultimate experience.

* ps: to sarahK, "...tuuutttseeettt..." is probably NOT
the way to spell the kiss kiss sounds 8-D