bottom of the list.

a posto. based on an article i read about
the overwhelming needs of the modern person.

some examples are worthy.

posto. based on my observation regarding KRFs

KRFs.

now, there are plenty of things that annoy the hell outta me.
but nothing more so than the K.R.F;

Konon Religious Folk.

you know who they are and what they’re like.
they’re the ones who say things like;

“…eh, ntah pape minah ni, pakai seksi-seksi…”
and yet you spend time ogling at women everywhere.

“...you memang patut kene, sebab you durhaka!...”
and yet you physically and emotionally abuse your wives.

“…eh, memang hak aku, sukati aku la!...”
and yet you marry lotsa women, despite tidak mampu.

“…memang patut derang ni kene rejam, buat maksiat je…”
and yet you watch scandalous videos of people / celebrities.

“…eh, aku ni menyampaikan jerrr. tanggungjawab kan?…”
and yet you don't really practice your religion fully.

so there it is. typical K.R.F's.
people who use religion as an excuse.
rather than a reason.

so, do us all a favor and go f%^& off.
besides, you’re no better than all of us.

you’re worse.

more than just a lineage.

y = mx + c

life is like a mathematical equation.

y is the heights you will reach in your life.
x is how far the distance you will go.
m is the slope and the challenge you will overcome.
and c is the intercept, the point where things come together.

life is like a mathematical equation. so make it count.

for you, and for your loved ones.

admit it.

another posto, off the brilliant
'shut up and kiss me' by orianthi

if you can call, you can type.

now, since i live by a strict 'not interested, so feck off!' policy
when it comes to ignoring phone calls from strangers,
i feel it is my duty to give you this tip;

if you call me over and over and over
without me picking up, chances are; i never will.

so do yourself a fecking favour and sms me
who the feck you are instead of fecking
calling me over and over until there's a zillion missed calls

tu pun nak ajar ke?

cow shit!

there is nothing funnier than to watch elmo swear!
i just love it hahahaha!

awww, citeh thot they were getting a point. how adorable! HAHAHAHAHAHA

here's a trivia question for you;

'what is worth paying 250k UK pounds per week for?'

THIS IS!

forget about the price tag!

the more i listen to this,
the more catchy i find it to be!
is jessie j the new katy perry / pink?

plus she has a cheeky smile. like me. heh

at least put an eyepatch on, willya?

is it just me, or is anyone else slightly dissapointed
that the somali pirates look more like a bunch of farmers
rather than swashbuckling pirates a.k.a jack sparrow?

bravo! how about watching paint dry, next?

off the star.com;

PAS youth is proposing a crackdown,
a moral policing campaign and proposal
for the upcoming Vday celebrations.

you know what? i think that's a great idea!

...i mean, it's not like they have anything else to do.

hosni konfesi of the day

you know what?

despite all the uproar
and despite all the chaos
and despite all the people globally worrying

i don't give a crap about what's happening in friggin' egypt.

gimme gimme food

the problem with living in the big, bad, scary city is,
you get accustommed to unpleasantness

you're used to it

you're used to people driving like crazy people.
you're used to people being rude to you.
you're used to people rushing and ignoring you

so imagine my deep, deep shock
when a total stranger asks me on the train earlier;

"...baru balek treveling ye? mesti penat kan?
what are you having for dinner?..."

so i stumble and mumble the 1st thing in my head;

"...erm, i'll eat whatever my neighbour gives me..."

WATEVER MY FRIGGIN' NEIGHBOUR GIVES ME?
WATEVER MY FRIGGIN' NEIGHBOUR GIVES ME?
WAT AM I, A FUZZY CAT?!!

god i feel like such an idiot 8-D

i from the poojoot you knooowwwsss?

for those of you who don't follow me on the twitter
bcos you think you're too cool or i'm too boring,
here are some of my tweets regarding this fellow;

* wow! things went well, despite a team member goes fecking
off to friggin' europe while we get hammered by reviewers

* i wonder what she's thinking;
"darn, the task tak siap lagi. oh well, im in friggin' europe"

* "siannyeee la derang kene present. would love to help.
but cant. since im in friggin' europe"

* "oh, presentation is in the vcr room. it's cold in there.
but not as cold as being here in friggin' europe"

* oh boy. back to the future is out next week and dragonage 2
is out in a month. no wonder i somehow need to be rich 8-/

* i wonder what is the release date
for those games in friggin' europe

* if she's off skiing smewhere, i hope she falls flat on her face.
over there in friggin' europe

* ok, why are people jumpin' off buildings now?

* i wonder if jumpin off buildings
are the trend over in friggin' europe

* wonder wat shes thinkin' today;
"besnyeee kalu pepagi pekene roti canai.
tapela, aku makan jela croissant ni. since im in friggin' europe"

* apekah?!! da kol 11 pagi?!! eh lupe, tu waktu mesia.
so bleh sambong tido. lupe plak i'm in friggin' europe

* bisek rimao sitok? yes. since meybenk ada di friggin' europe

* mari begambo seblah signbod 'underground' di london!
padahal ade je signbod lrt tu kat mesia.
tapi tape since i'm in friggin' europe

* "i am from mesia u knowwwwww".
syok sendiri promo mesia kat homputeh.
padahal diri sendiri pi friggin' europe instead of pi A Famosa

* hahaha! tegelak bace mende2 yang ditulis oleh diri sendiri.
hahaha! oh well, its boarding time.
balek kl tau, bukan pi friggin' europe

sekianterimekaseh.

tu pun, kalau awak sudi le kaaan?

malay people are just plain nasty.

no, better yet, they know how to be nasty in a nice way.
a prime example of that is the use of the term;
"...itu pun, kalau awak sudi..."

now, that term is used to corner other people
into submitting to our every single needs.
it excels in doing that, simply bcos it takes away
the pressure from us, to the other person in question

it questions the other person's morality instead.

say no, and the other person becomes a bad person.
say no, and the other person is the inconsiderate one.
say no, and the other person is perceived as evil

it is downright GENIUS!

so, the next time you want something from your malay frens,
use the term profusely, bcos more often that not,
your fren will buckle under his / her morality,
and submit to every single whim you might have!

contoh penggunaan;

"...dah 15 jam saye tidak makan. boleh ke awak
tolong banje saye makan ayam kfc? itu pun, kalu sudi..."

and PRESTO! you'd be munching on kfc in no time!

don't you just love being nasty?
i certainly do. heheheh!

one in a million

people like to talk about finding the 1 in a million

let's give it some perspective;
what's our population now? 27 million?

that means there's 27 of those special people

slice that by gender, and you may have,
say, 14 special women, and 13 special men.
and out of that portion, take out the ones who are taken,
so that makes it, say, 7 and 6 special men and women

7 and 6. out of 27 million!

so, what are the odds for US finding that 7 and 6 people?
and once we do, what are the odds of them
finding US to be what they're looking for?

in a way, that pretty much means
that finding that 1 in a million is virtually impossible.

but here's the thing, the great thing about love is,
you don't have to be that 1 in a million,
and you don't have to be that 1 special person
that EVERYONE is seeking for

...you only have to be yourself

the key is not being the 1 in a million.
the key is not being the best person on earth.
the key, is to be the 1 for YOUR soulmate

and by being that, makes you THE 1 in a gazillion!

fidbek of the day

now, every year we get feedback from colleagues
in the form of comments, both on our strengths,
and also our room for improvement!

imagine my amusement and shock to see
this written down for me,
under 'room for improvement'

"...sometimes, he can be too outspoken..."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

alright, i am 1st to admit that i do speak my mind,
and sometimes, erm, i become very sarcastic at work hehe!
BUT in my defence, i think it's better to be
opinionanted, rather than jadi pak angguk sane sini 8-D

but in the interest of my future feedback,
fine, fine, i get the message,
ill learn to shut my mouth from now on

will update everyone on my progress ya 8-D

outpsoken-ness of the day

nope. can't do it. sorry 8-D

you know what? instead of shutting up,
i'll be using the term 'outspoken'
a whooooole lot more from now on heheh!

ill be introducing new vocabulary to work,
all incorporating the term 'outspoken'

contoh penggunaan;

"...i am outspokenly hungry right now!..."

"...i am outspokenly thirsty today!..."

"...i want to pee, outspokenly..."

sekianterimekaseh

decide things are gonna be ok.

i read that things that matter to us
are the things that bring us pain

i think that makes perfect sense,
since when something affects things that matter to us,
we become angry, worried, agitated, concerned

...and we'd do everything in our power to make it right

take me, for example. i am in the middle of
struggling to save enough money to move in my new place.
and judging by the way things are going,
i MIGHT be able to move in, say early 2013

that causes me a lot of pain

i angry about it to no end,
i am worried that it may take me too long,
i am agitated that i must earn / save more for it,
i am concerned about leaving my place unattended for years

but i learnt something the other week

i talked about the whole thing to my folks,
and my folks, being folks, offered to cover what i need.
i couldn't believe my ears, bless them!

it made me realize something.
if i worry excessively about it,
it causes pain to myself AND my folks!
so not only is it bad for my health,
my folks starts being concerned about me as well

so i think it's all a matter of changing your perspective

i have decided that this is not the end of the world.
i have decided that i am capable of getting what i need.
i have decided that this isn't worth worrying my folks.
i have decided that i can take my time.
i have decided that everything will be ok!

so now i'm fine with the whole thing.
cos you see, as much as the new place matters,
it's the state of happiness of my folks
that eclipses everything else for me

and that, i think, is what matters most to me

kelegaan of the day

based on yesterday's conversation

person A : bile awak salu rase lege?

person B : saye lege bile siap yepr

person C : saye lege bile projek ni siap nanti

mua : saye lege pas kencing dam flite.

at least i was honest ok

sungguh ku ingin kau tahu.

i just lurve this song! and the band as well.
i think the melodies are just brilliant 8-)

little miss daisy

there are things about my life that i miss

i miss sitting down by the harbour.
i miss driving around home, just to look at houses.
i miss going back to high school and meeting teachers.
i miss night walks all over campus.
i miss being kakak's housemate.
i miss being at home with family when i was unemployed.
i miss gathering around with everyone during raye.
i miss spending the whole day in bed reading.
i miss being able to write well in blogs.
i miss having stray cats as pets. like bruno and saddam.
i miss days out with amir, rizal and saradha.
i miss having saiko scribbling her birthday on my calendar.
i miss swearing my ass off and being bitter with violet.
i miss having long, long chats with k_melati,
i miss friends i worked with who are no longer there.
i miss being smart in school.

but then again...

the harbour is still there whenever i visit.
i still drive around whenever i come home.
i know my teachers are happily retired and relaxed now.
the campus is now a bigger place to have walks on.
kakak has better housemates now, mumu mylia and bg romy.
i am employed now. and it's a decent job.
there are new nieces and nephews now to meet during raye.
i am still able to read. wonderful wonderful books.
i am still able to write. and i love veggiesNL.
there are cute strays using my porch as their hotel.
amir, rizal and saradha continues to be my close friends.
saiko has gone on to better things in her life.
violet continues to be the life of the party for many.
k_melati is needed a lot more than she needs us all.
my friends i worked with are developing. very well.
i am still smart. or maybe it's smart ass, who knows!

alhamdulillah. for the life i have now.

go suffer. then come back.

to the person in question;

i am not religious enough,
but i think this is god's way
to make you open your eyes

i hope you realize that you are lucky.
i hope you realize that you have a good life.
and a good husband. and a good kid.
i hope you see that you don't have to worry
about stupid things in your life,
and that things you perceive as huge problems
are actually not problems at all

i hope you come back the person we all love.
i hope you come back being enlightened.
i hope you come back being happy with your life.

i really, hope you come back. for ALL our sakes.

confessions on the go!

off the news on the net, apple has developed
a new application for it's apple devices!

a confession application for catholics!

this would enable people to make their confessions
through the apple devices, rather than go off
to some church and confess their sins to a priest

wow. now THAT, is called convenience. hahahaha!

wisdom of the day

fuzzy. and wise.

this one is off the twitter;

elmo thinks snow white would make a great judge!
know why? bcos she's the fairest of them all haha!

...you gotta love dis darn fuzzy creature 8-D

clap yo hands!

let's face it, this certainly isn't the best
r&b and ne-yo song ever, but it sure is catchy!

me likey 8-)

one plus two is seven!

ne nice. or become stupid.

we should be nice to animals.

when i was a kid, i used to gunteng bulu tinge
and cut of the edges of cat's whiskers

the poor furball would then find itself
becoming dissoriented, running into walls
and falling off sofas for no apparent reason

seemed harmless at the time.

but i believe in karma,
which is why skang buduh keje,
pastuh tak reti reti nak kire.
sume gune kelkuleter. darab pun tak reti da

and as a result, skang jadi disoriented keje,
running into brick walls when it comes to results,
and falling off the radar for no apparent reason.

so there, i accept the fact that
my math sucks big time simply bcos
of my past evils towards komuniti kuceng kite.

hang what you learn!

nice deco. just like eLearning certs.

knowledge is a decoration.

now, there is a system that we have at work
that is an electronic learning system,
which is pretty much a virtual classroom

so what you do is, you signup and login,
and next thing you know, you have access to
a wonderfully large choice of subjects
and eCourses you can learn from!

and that is nice. if you have nothing else to do.

ni tak, da la keje sendiri pon belambak2,
sehari tak cukup 8 jam nak buat mende,
5 ari seminggu tak cukup gok,
so you end up pi ofis lagi wikend
just to cover mase untuk buat keje tuh,
since time weekday you get pulled here and there
pegi miting la, cari data la, hapdet spredshit la...

and that is also nice. if you don't have a life.
or want to end up dead at work or jadi zombie

and now, it is COMPULSORY for us to buat eLearning tu

so, on TOP of not having a life
and not having enough time to buat keje sendiri,
you now have to do the eLearning,
which takes FOREVER to go through bcos
sometimes the system is unstable,
and paling sakit hati is when you're almost done,
the system crashes, and you do it all over again

and in the end, after going through ALL that,
you're still unsure whether you've actually learnt anything.

but it's alright, at least you have a nice eLearning cert
that you can print out and happily stick on office cabinet!

see? knowledge is just a decoration.

eSquirming

now, since it's rather unfair to criticize
the wonderful eLearning without offering solutions,
i feel obliged to offer a solution
to the erm, non-learning from eLearning;

an eModule that helps you realize that mundane things
can also benefit your knowledge AND it can be used
in your everyday life bcos sometimes you don't realize
that you SHOULD know certain things, but you don't!

so, i proudly present to you;
the questions on eSquirming!

1. do dogs have whiskers?

2. what is the difference between ikan keli and ikan gelama?

3. is a carrot a fruit or vegetable?

4. if your socks are similiar, how do you decide to wear it
either on the left or on the right?

5. what are coins made of?

6. why do talk show hosts say "...dont touch that dial!..."
when we all use a remote control?

7. why is it called lion dance when the thingy
that jumps around looks like a dragon?

8. how does sms get from my phone to yours within seconds?

9. what on EARTH do gals hafta carry around so much,
dat they need to carry big bags all the time?

10. kenapekah kentut sangat bau sedangkan
ayam kfc kite makan sangat harum?

sekianterimekaseh.

E is for friggin Europe!

now, what is the best way to be part of a team?

you'd think it was to actually show an INTEREST
in what the team is trying to achieve,
you'd think it was to actually offer to do a role
within the team and plan for it with the team,
you'd think it was to actually plan your schedule
around when the team has to finish the project
and present it to the host government

well, you'd be wrong.

the best way to be a part of a team
is to go run around vacationing in friggin' europe.
while your team members get hammered by reviewers.

true story. 8-D

we can't take it anymore. maybe africans can!

now, what happens when you become a bitter bitch
and you pretty much piss everyone within your reach?

well, you get shipped off to africa.
to piss off poor ol' africans instead.

true story. hahahahahahaha!

exams. it never ends.

this is off zu's status in fb

every year we have this exam you see,
in order to get promoted, so that we could earn,
well, somewhere around 25 bucks extra. 8-D

anyway, more often than not,
we are treated like children during the exam,
and we are often verbally abused
for 'not being good enough' and
for 'not understanding anything' and
generally for being a complete moron

so, this is what transpired from zu's
(and plenty of others, me included) exam session;

panel : are you sure you are an engineer?
your answer makes me want to open this window
and jump out from this tower!

and zu's response?

zu : be my guest.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
i think that's hilarious 8-D