forward thinking.

they say we should always look forward,
so here's a video of what i look forward to in 2012!
i'll see you next year.

More none Videos

ruler ruler of the day

off my jots on the twitter;

"...when it comes to driving, 

i have a very simple rule; 

get the fuck out of my way..."

2011 reflection of the day

"...i cannot believe we have already went thru 

another 12 months of absolute fuckery..." 

- kingsley from 'overexposed', youtube.

pearl of wisdom of the day

"...stickin feathers up your butt doesn't make you a chicken..."

- tyler durden; off 'fight club'

sometimes when i miss you, i put those records on.

another lyrical posto; off katy perry's
pretty cool "the one that got away"

survey supermarket?

now, i hate doing surveys.

i hate doing surveys marked 'confidential'.

i hate doing surveys marked 'confidential'
but you hafta write down your NAME,
STAFF NUMBER and HP NUMBER.

i hate doing surveys marked 'confidential'
but you hafta write down your NAME,
STAFF NUMBER and HP NUMBER,
with a 'true' or 'false' survey of;

i like to go to seminars / workshops /

training because i want to escape

from my daily workload. (T/F)

WHAT THE FECK IS DAT?
dumbass. asking dumbass questions
thru a dumbass survey, dat's what.

i.am.me.

the problem with having high moral standards is;
people would straightaway categorize you in that bracket.
and people expect you to portray that ALL THE TIME

you say something good one day, the next you don't,
they go; "...aritu bukan men cakap mende elok..."
you do something good one day, the next you don't,
they go; "...aik, skali je kerrr nak buat kebajikan nih?..."
you dwell a bit on religion one day, the next you don't,
they go; "...hek eleh aritu pi bace kor'an. ape barang?..."

see? people are just fuckers.

this is why i'm a huge advocate of being uncategorized.
and unlabeled. and contradictory. and confusing.
because that's who i am and what i am

i am not a person with high moral standards,
i am not a person with constant religiousness,
and i am certainly not a person who is evil either

i.am.me.

so, at the end of the day, you have 3 choices;
either you retaliate and lower down your moral standards,
you retaliate but keep your moral standards as they are,
or, you go ahead and just do what i do.

...which is to realize that people are just a bunch of
whingy motherfuckers and they should just shove it
up their ass and go die and burn in hell.

there. i said it. *moral graph dips*

ABOW #18

one should never view oneself as being 'extraordinary'

since the 'extra' conveys that not only one is ordinary,
but one is even MORE ordinary than ordinary people!
and since ordinary people are ordinary as the terms suggests,
it makes one a step lower down, due to the 'extra'

so there. one should refer to oneself as ordinary.
unless one is me. because i am awesome.
and it's ordinary for it to be that way.

sekiantimekaseh. 

(the twitter) thought of the day

marriage is a good idea.
i just don't think it's a good idea for me.

wish wish.

be someone's sunshine. it's worth it. 

there are days when i wish that everyday
would end up with me making a difference
and making someone's life a bit better

you know, when you do or say something
that would actually lift someone up,
make them realize how great they are
or how they can be, and how they too
can make a difference for others

how awesome would that be?

to be the sunshine in someone's life,
to be the difference in someone's path,
to be the vehicle for positive change.

oh well, wishful thinking perhaps.

APA - HR

hellue people! i am proud to announce
a brand new section, based on the hilarious
video clips from "better off ted"

i proudly present to you;

APA (Avoch Public Announcement!)

oh well, whatever, nevermind.

another lyrical posto to commemorate nirvana.
off the brilliant "smells like teen spirit"

PAR #11

vote for me, and i won't waste the nation's
money and resources to send evil people to jail.
as much as human rights is important,
there are plenty of times when it is irrelevant

i advocate the thought that, if you knowingly
and willingly murdered someone in cold blood,
then you waived your rights to be treated as human beings.

shoot em all. see? dead. done. vote for me.

ABOW #17

one should always focus on another's humanity

take midgets for example;
one must realize that they are human beings too.
sure, they may be shorter, freakier, grumpier,
vertically-challenged versions of human beings,
but they are still human beings nonetheless

and that is what one should be focusing on

ABOW #16

when dealing with a midget, one must try to
seek for the pros and strengths of the midget,
dan jangan memandang rendah ok

...eventhough you simply HAVE to sebab die ketot.

barulah terasa Ku bernyawa

another lyrical posto, this time interpreted off
the very melodic 'sedetik lebih' by anuar zain

no happy ever after.

a lyrical posto; slightly modified
off the delightful 'disaster' by jojo

five.the upward turn.

-the upward turn-

thank god i am able to sleep in hotels every now and then,
thank god i can afford to go away for the weekends,
thank god i have interests that i can pursue,
thank god i have friends to talk to and to confide in,
thank god i have family to find understanding and faith in

thank.god.

it's often a choice.

broken pieces can also be a beautiful thing 

i guess there are plenty of merit when it comes to
celebrating big achievements and successes in life

people love winners, people love success,
and people love to see big dreams being realized

i'm not really in that mould.

i prefer less spectacular but equally,
if not more, important successes in life

like upholding and becoming a good person,
despite going thru hardship and facing
challenges and responsibilities beyond your years

too often you hear stories of people
getting broken and reverting to negative things,
just to find solace and escapism

but every now and then you also hear of
stories where people negate being broken,
and find goodness within themselves to succeed

...and i think that is one of the biggest successes ever.

being broken is often a personal choice.
even if you come from a broken family,
YOU don't have to be broken.

kudos to that.

on this side or the other.

passed on from generation to generation 

a while ago there was this article in the news,
where the local community came together
and nabbed a snatch thief, and beat the guy to death

justice served? community safety upheld? definitely.

...until they found out the thief HAD to do it
because he was really poor and desperate
and that his newborn baby was starving

i guess that puts things into perspective;
that sometimes good people do bad things,
that not all bad people are bad to the core,
and perhaps they want to revert,
but are too involved with crime and wrong-doing,
that they think it's too late to turn back

...and that salvation may never come

there in which lies my admiration for this movie,
it portrays a man who is, in his core, good.
and that he seeks solace and salvation

sometimes salvation comes in the form of,
not a deed, but of a person

the town. go watch

ABOW #15

the problem with lavish weddings is
that people think its their happy ending.

it isn't. it's just the start.

did i lose the biggest part of my plan?

another lyrical posto; this time based on
the fantastic 'i want it all' from travis garland

ABOW #14

in life, when negotiating through hardship and pain,
one must learn to give oneself a lot of credit.
because not many people in this world will.

and even if they did, it won't be sincere.

defending one's honour. brilliant.

there are times when there is a moment or a scene
that just blows you away with it's brilliance.
this is one of them; al pacino's speech in 'scent of a woman'.

truth of the day

if being on your good side is your idea of a friendship,
then perhaps it really isn't a friendship afterall.

cant move forward, cant move back.

an intriguing one, credit juju for the brilliant posto!

moneyball

am waiting. for this one.

Ku saat itu takut mencari Makna.

a lyrical posto, with a slightly different interpretation,
adapted from "ruang rindu" by letto

ABOW #13

yup, in both cases, they're chocolate in colour.

forrest gump's mama was indeed a wise ol' woman.
however, life isn't really like a box of chocolates.
life is actually more like lifting the lid of a public toilet bowl

you are scared to see what you're gonna get.

put your money where your mouth is.

here's the thing about me;
there are plenty of things i don't give a shit about,
but there are plenty of things i take personally.

and you better hope i don't take it personally.

'cos if i do, i don't just sit quietly and take it.
so the next time you wanna run your mouth,
be prepared to put money in it.

because i have no problems burning you down,
and i have no problems making your life difficult,
should you decide to attack my team-mates

i take THAT personally.

ABOW #12

making the poor thing look like an idiot. not cool. 

now, one should know by now that love is complex.
so, one should not assume unconditional love,
particularly when it comes to pets.

why? because it is such a biased opinion,
it is such an unnecessary expectation to burden the pet with,
and it isn't inconceivable that your pet, well, hates you.

you think it's nice to hafta be cute just to be fed?
think it's easy to be cuddly just to get rubbed?
think it's cool to be called "tompok" in front of other pets?

so there you go, people!
under no circumstances whatsoever should you
assume that your pet loves you unconditionally.

he might just think you're a prick.

for me, what it boils down to is...

i long for this; making up for what i missed.

another posto off the click five's "don't let me go".
i can't get enuff of this song at the moment 8-) 

four.depression.loneliness.

-depression-

this is the tricky part; conventional wisdom tells me
that the physical manifestation of depression
is the desire to be gloomy and alone

...but what if i were always like that?

what if i were always the type who enjoyed solitude?
what if i were always the type to be gloomy?
does that mean i suffer from depression. already?

i don't view it that way, though.
i think it's normal for someone like me,
and i just think that there are days when i am just sad

ending a relationship saddens me too.

-loneliness-

some people deal with loneliness by talking about it,
some people take up some new hobby,
and some people just revert to good ol' chocolate

...i shop. A LOT.

they say retail therapy isn't really therapy,
specially once you take a good look at your statements,
but dealing is dealing i think, regardless.

normally i would be a lot more sensible,
but hey, in this case, i'm defending it.
because it makes me happy. and i have tangible stuff.

but there is also a great part of me that see this
as a good thing compared to dragging friends down for chats.
i know that friends will be there for you, regardless...

but here's the thing;

i feel guilty and embarrassed to take their time.
simply because it was easy for me to not hangout
when i had a relationship back then

and now reaching out when i'm alone seems, tacky.

...or maybe it's just me. who knows.

i wonder if my words are making any difference

another lyrical posto, this time off wonderfully
melodic "don't let me go" by the click five

you never were a friend of mine.

a lyrical posto, off katharine mcphee's "over it"

ABOW #11

if you have fat fingers like me,
then do not buy fancy touch-screen phones.
it's embarrassing to see sms' like;

"...Hi# hOwr3 Y0u 7odaY?..."

PAR #10

vote for me, and i will guarantee you clean elections!
i will enforce people to shower before voting / campaigning.

'well, that narrows it down then' of the day

hands up if you look like bert sesame street! 

got a shocking email at work earlier today

apparently one of the staff got robbed
while walking back to her car after work.
upon describing the assailant, it was a;

"...30 - 40 year old male indian,

slim, with thick eyebrows..."

so, the only thing the police hafta do is
nab one of, maybe 1 million slim indian guys,
who just happens to have thick eyebrows.

easy. i give it 3 days.

'being in my shoes' of the day

UK size 10. that's me. just in case. 

ever wonder what it's like being in my shoes?

when i'm serious, people think i'm kidding,
and when i'm kidding, people take me seriously.
i can't seem to win haha!

but i probably wouldn't have it any other way.

PAR #9

vote for me, and i'll force karamsingh walia 
to talk 5 hours non-stop on tv.
without putting up his hands.

PAR #8

vote for me, and i'll make sure we have banyak gile 
cite and muvi bangla kat astro first.
only then we can truly understand their plight ok?

PAR #7

vote for me, and i'll harass mas and airasia and
proton and maybank and cimb for money.
takkan asek kacau petronas je kottt

but i won't harass public bank le.
since aku suke tengok celebration ala-ala
komunis and chairman mao derang kat youtube

PAR #6

vote for me, and i'll give all who oppose us one-way tickets
untuk pegi duduk and pegi mampos kat central africa

tapi solomon tak dapat le kan,
since die suke je kot balek afrika sane tuh.

PAR #5

vote for me, and i'll endorse discipline teachers to beat up kids
who beat up other weak, defenceless kids in school.

PAR #4

vote for me, and i will demonstrate the true
spirit and meaning of mesia bleh;

bleh la sabsidi rege minyak, supaye rakyat bleh 
isi petrol secare free kat stesen minyak seluruh negare

bleh la sabsidi rege tol, supaye rakyat bleh 
pegi sane sini secare free ke seluruh pelusuk negare

bleh la sabsidi sume makanan, supaye rakyat bleh 
makan free sesuke ati di seluruh negare

bleh la sabsidi yuran skolah, supaye rakyat bleh 
la jadi cerdik pandai sket

and despite doing all that, the rakyat will still go;

"...tapi tak cukop! bleh la tlong lagi, bleh la!..."

see? the rakyat are feckers.
i mean, who cares about developing the nation
and moving forward kan? idiots. vote PAR.

PAR #3

vote for me, and i'll make sure that friggin
boy-genius-mathematician-druggie-boy
admits that the whole thing is fraud

and that his aim is to manufacture
and distribute drugs to kids of all ages
and be the prime minister someday

it's all a friggin act, i tell you.

PAR #2

vote for me, and i'll make sure we
dont waste our resources and
put an end to all this anwar nonsense

i mean so what if he bonks boys and hookers?

so what if he sucks ceck?
plenty of mesians do.

and so what if he bonks hookers?
bukannye bayo gune duit rakyat pon.

remember; PAR tau!

wanna be on par?

now, a lot of people, at some point or another,
whether secretly or otherwise, does harbour dreams
to become illegally rich a politician

i am no different.

i hereby announce that i am making plans
to one day realize that great dream by
forming my own party; Parti Anti Rakyat (PAR)

so over time i will share with you my manifestos,
so that you would be better equipped in the future
to provide me with illegal money your great support

PAR #1

vote for me, and i will ensure your money goes
straight to my bank account rather than use it
to build schools and roads and all that crap.

the point? i'll be the 1st honest politician. EVER.

pragmatol.

guys are pragmatic

when it comes to soap or cleaning products,
we are result driven, we don't need bells and whistles,
and we are certainly straight to the point and pragmatic.

that's why we don't care about pH levels,
or whether the soap cleanses our pores,
or whether it makes us smell like roses.

beli je dettol satu, bleh gune untuk sabon muke,
sabon badan, sabon bontot, cuci baju,
cuci pinggan mangkuk kat dapor, dan sebagainye.

asal ade buih tu, kire ok le tuh.

see? pragmatic.

(the twitter) reply of the day

happened just now, on the twitter;

fwen : this cough is such a bitch

mua : and so are you.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

ABOW #10

when faced with insults or a barrage of verbal provocation,
one should always remain calm and silent.
there is no need for one to verbally insult the other person back.

just give them the finger.

ABOW #9

do not be judgemental towards people
who "like" their own status and pictures
on their always updated fesbuk profiles

they accidently clicked on it, okay?

ABOW #8

it isn't cool to assume all sawakians eat /
know how to bake / always have in their homes
that bloody kek lapis sawak

it's like assuming all indians dance around trees
and sing in the heavy pouring rain when they
were younger / dating / in love

ABOW #7

it's funny to see white people playing for the all blacks

it's either something unintended,
something uplifting and inspirational,
or a cruel joke to play on colour-blind rugby players

ABOW #6

do not take it personally when salesmen and women
do NOT approach you in shopping complexes,
because it has NOTHING to do with your personality.

you just look poor, that's all.

ABOW #5

in some parts, during breakups,
there is always the really cliche
but the truthful ideology of;

"...it isn't you, it's me..."

but in most parts, it really isn't.

it's YOU.

ABOW #4

for years and years people have talked about
gender equality and being on the same level
and being of equal stature and standard.

the ABOW? you have to acknowledge the success.

the pinnacle of gender equality is the right to become a lesbo.

ABOW #3

you know, when it comes to being offensive,
people like to cover their asses
and be nice to the public by saying;

"...oh, i didn't mean to offend you!..."

the ABOW? they DID mean to offend your ass.

and if they didn't, then they're idiots.
bcos the whole point of making offensive remarks
IS to offend other people, you see?

otherwise there wouldn't be any point in doing it.

ABOW #2

the trend now is to play futsal

you have futsal games after work,
futsal league over the weekend,
and generally futsal fever everywhere

and if you don't sign up for fecking futsal
then it means you are not haptodet
and athletic and macho badan beketol2

here's the ABOW;
derang sume tu nak glemer je lebeh,
bukannye reti men pon,
sepak and lari pon cam katak.

oh, and most of them are gay.

ABOW #1

admit it. you like nice, fuzzy, round balls. 

let's face it; everyone loves pearls of wisdom

people all around the world look for thoughts
and perspective and words and pearls of wisdom
for pretty much about everything under the sun

i feel ya bros / sistas!

hence, i have decided to release this brand new segment,
sharing my personal wisdom and views about, well,
pretty much anything and everything in life

it'll be rash, it'll be harsh, it'll be offensive,
it'll be racist, it'll be obscene.
in other words, just plain bitchy.

...but it'll be wise. wisdom, you see?

i proudly bring to you; avoch balls of wisdom!

ABOW#1

earlier this morning, channel 100 on astro was showing
clips and videos and songs from the late leslie cheung.

the ABOW? stop showing it.

bcos nobody gives a feck about fecking leslie cheung.

three.anger.bargaining.

-anger-

i'm sure i should be,
but i'm not angry.
not even in the slightest bit.

i'm just dissapointed.

but here's the kicker;
i'm not dissapointed that i'm not with the girl,
i'm just dissapointed that i am alone.

again.

-bargaining-

in the past i would analyze and re-analyze
what went wrong / how to improve,
and should we give it another shot?

but nowadays since i'm older,
i've learnt that sometimes shit just happens,
and returning to the ex is always a bad idea

you can always look back to the early days,
you can always look back when you were happy,
but never overlook the fact you had problems

and if there is no solution to it, then walk away

...and never bargain back.

it's us, not you.

another lyrical posto, this time off the
very dope "laff at em" by timbaland, justin timberlake & jay-z.
it's awesome.

two.pain.guilt.

-pain-

pain is relative.

i guess it depends on your experience.
the 1st time usually weighs heavily on you more,
but the more you experience it, the less it affects you

but that doesn't mean it won't hurt. someway.

-guilt-

regardless of whether the decision is the right one,
and regardless of whether it's best for both sides,
the guilt of breaking someone's heart is still there

everyone tells you to decide what's best,
everyone tells you to stand up and be a man,
and everyone tells you to do the right thing

but having said all that,
there is something that everyone does NOT tell you.
something that rings true and true about all this;

...doing the right thing sucks.

everything was easy then, so sweet and innocent.

another lyrical posto, off the wonderful
"always on your side" by sheryl crow and sting

one.denial.shock.

they say that there are 7 stages of grief

they say everyone goes through it somehow.
i think it is important to gain perspective where we can,
perhaps i'll give this a shot and see where it goes;

-denial-

i know it happened,
i'm sure i made it happen,
it just somehow doesn't feel that way

i guess it still hasn't fully sunk in. 

-shock-

i can't say this came as a shock.

things have gone downhill over the past year,
and issues have escalated over the past few months,
over and over and over.

without even a hint of light at the end of the tunnel.

so no, it doesn't come as a shock.
truthfully, the only shocking thing about it
is how i've kept it going for all this time

looking back, i probably shouldn't have.

as i watch from afar

another lyrical posto, off the soothing
"you don't know me" from michael buble 

by wrong.

in drilling, they have this additive called 'barite' 

the function of 'barite' is to add weight to the drilling mud,
resulting in it being able to handle high pressure,
so that it can be suitably used for safe drilling operations

...that is an example of a good additive

in life, they have this additive called 'by right' 

the usage of 'by right' is to point out other's responsibilities,
to add (sometimes) unnecessary high pressure to people,
so we have our way when it comes to controlling others

...that is an example of a bad additive

for example, we use the 'by rights' in situations such as

"...hey, by right YOU are the one that has to do it!...", 

or "...by right, men are the one's that has to fulfill all this!...", 
or "...by right, you should be respecting me as your landlord!..." 
or "...by right, you ought to pay more than all of us!..." 

now here's my problem with that mentality; insensibility.

sure, in most cases people may be right about it,
or sure, it may the norm for our society to expect certain things,
but is it really that hard to help out a little?

is it really tough to lend a helping hand to others?
is it really demeaning to do mundane tasks in work?
is it really a burden to lighten other people's life?

maybe. maybe not.

so here's what i think, use less 'by rights',
and try to be a bit more sensible
when it comes to everyday decisions and everyday life

...it'll be a far better additive in your life, trust me.

'cerdik tahap gaban' of the day

off mStar online;

now, lemme get this straight;
gempe bumi tu kat sumatera sane tuh,
and yet the, (check DIS out!)

Pengerusi Jawatankuasa kebajikan, Kesihatan, 

Masyarakat Penyayang dan Alam Sekitar,
says that it is the reason for masalah jerebu kat penang.

tengok la betape cerdiknye oghang mesia nih. LOL

i want a little something more.

another lyrical posto, slightly modified,
off the soothing tune of "love that will last" by renee olstead

stop whinging and be respectable, boleh?

OMG the tragedy of a broken egg! 

perhaps we've all experienced the tragedy of dropping eggs

you know, that horrible moment when you open the fridge,
pick up a couple of eggs and hurriedly moving away,
only to see (in slow motion) one of the eggs flying off
before landing (in slow motion) with a big ol' SPLAT!

it's tragic, isn't it?

now, under normal circumstances you would sympathize,
you would help clean up the terrible mess,
and you would offer to get some new eggs if you could

but here's the thing, what if the person in question
becomes super obsessed with the dropped egg?

i'm talking, taking vivid pictures of the egg,
sobbing away and telling EVERYONE about the thing,
setting up a memorial in loving memory of the egg,
putting up slow motion videos of the egg on youtube,
then going on the news to recall the ordeal to the public,
then preceeding to blame the fridge manufacturer as well

and the person does it. year after year after year.

see my point? at first you are sad and you sympathize,
your heart goes out to the person and the egg,
but after a while it becomes annoying and whingy

really, really, really whingy.

that's how the western media feels to me
whenever bloody sept 11 comes along.
it's a whingy show of "...look world, we're victims!..."

here's the thing, everyone goes through tragedy.
be respectful to those lost by being respectable.
otherwise, shit happens globally, so get over it.

and get over yourselves too.

*dush* wow saketnye kene air!

water balloons. no, sorry, grenades. 

what's the craziest thing you'd do for love?

some might jump off a building,
others might profess their love with tattoos,
others might serenade loved ones in public

but bruno mars would catch a grenade for ya.

that's right, when asked the same question on mtv,
bruno mars said; "...me? i'd catch a grenade..."
he then went on to tell this lovely story
about him heroically jumping in front of a lady
when he saw that lady was about to be hit by
a flying 'water balloon grenade'.
that's right folks, a.water.balloon.grenade.

oh, and she had a brand new dress on.

first of all, how on earth would you know
the dress is new unless you're a stalker?
or unless for some reason when you said;

"...you look great, love your dress..."

in which she rather bizaarely replied;

"...it's a brand new dress. just got it..."

instead of; "...thanks!..."

second of all, it's one thing to think of
'saving' a lady from getting mildly soaked
with a friggin water balloon as
'the craziest thing i'd do for love',
it's another thing altogether to refer
a harmless water balloon as a 'grenade',
in order NOT to sound like a total wuss

and lastly, hey, why not write a song
about your super duper heroics
and get adored by millions of people!
and perhaps then go on to make a video
of you prancing around with fucking monkeys
before wonderfully being referred to as

bruno planet of the fucking apes

ok fine, i'm done. *catches water balloon*

to those we've lost.

pengumuman of the day

off my account on the twitter;

pengumuman; tak sume orang sawak buat / makan kek lapis ok. 

so sile jangan menyoal siasat saya mengenai hal itu esok.
tampo kang.

(mistaken) identity of the day

sibu has a nice, erm, pintu gerbang. 

see where my confusion came from? 

here's a story for you!

since i tend to be a bit friendly on flights,
i was having a decent conversation with a matsleh.
and the matsleh was telling me about his
travels all around asia, particularly here in mesia

now, for some reason he started to absolutely
rave and became excited about sibu.
he told me that he loved the beaches there,
the food was pretty good, and he loved
the local buildings and the friendly people

...needless to say i was shocked.

so after a few minutes he kept talking about
how he loved the snorkeling and nice beaches,
and all i could think to myself was;

"...bior beno matsleh nih. sibu cam kodi je..."

took me a while to realize he was actually
talking about CEBU. the one in the philippines

ok, so NOW it makes perfect sense.
kooos semengat. 

it's all about us.

another lyrical posto, this time off the
super-duper catchy "all about him" from auburn!

make your list count.

wahai rakyat! mari dapatkan duet dari kompeni kaye raye ini.

let's face it; everyone has stories when it comes to raya.
some are good, some are bad, some are just weird.
so here's a few sniplets of what usually happens in mine;

1. being one of the main attractions;
- since i was always the smart, lovable but skinny boy,
i was always one of the main attractions. picture this;
when uncles / aunts / cousins come over to grandma's,
the 1st thing they ask for is me. hahaha!

2. eating more than you should;
- the problem with celebrating raya is, you fast for
a month and now all of a sudden you have access to
yummy yummy raya food 24/7. not good.
for digestions. and for your BMI.
sib bek ade carta comel, to keep me in check.

3. living in a more uncomfortable state for a few days;
- let's face it. chances are, your family / grandma's
place may not be what you're used to and / or
comfortable with. in my case, im swapping my huuuge
leather bed for lantai and nyamok non-stop ok

4. the favourite aunt and uncle;
- i know we're supposed to love our family
unconditionally, but hey, i'm human,
so my main highlight is to see my fave aunt / uncle

5. the favourite male / female cousins;
- i always look forward to seeing my guy cousin,
who i've always looked up to ever since i was a kid,
and my gal cousin, who i've always loved
because she is wacky and hilarious

6. the awkward small talk you're forced to make;
- you can't get along with everybody, so there are times
when you have no choice but to have forced,
awkward, horribly nonsensical conversations
with people you don't know and / or
family members you don't want to know

7. the family skeletons;
- everyone has skeletons in their closet.
for us, it's always intriguing to see people avoid
certain topics, just because everyone is uncomfy
with it and it can raise world war III

8. the emergence of the AlterEgo;
- just like the early days of courtship,
raye is when you put your best foot forward.
in my case; tetibe je aku sangat mesre rakyat,
pastuh solat lime waktu on the dot plak tuh.

9. the appreciation of what you've become;
- sometimes we take ourselves for granted.
our achievements and who we are may not be
anything much to us, but sometimes when
family members are proud of you,
it makes us realize how proud we should be too

10. the appreciation of what's not forever;
- despite all the bizaare things you hafta deal with,
despite being uncomfortable or ecstatic,
you realize one thing; it won't last forever.
so immerse yourself in the experience,
make each second count, because your family
and gatherings won't last forever.

i have 10 things on my list. make yours count.

wowowo hati girang!

sile drive slow-slow. kang wowowo pi bayo saman plak.

perjalanan balek tak ku rasaaaaaa,
kerna balek naik air asiaaaaaa,
mari balek kampong sama-samaaaaaa,
mane tau dapat duet rayaaaaaa!

wowowo balek kampoooooong,
wowowo balek kampoooooong,
wowowo balek kampoooooong,
hati giraaaaaang!

hihi.

good. pass it on.

when i was younger, i did my practical training
over at this hot-shot company back home

it was intimidating.

but here's the thing; my supervisors made me
feel as if i was part of the work family straightaway,
they made me realize i could do anything i set my mind to,
and they made me feel that my small contribution
was like the best thing in the world!

that, in many ways, can change one's self esteem
in such a positive manner, it's unbelievable!

so that's the experience i try to pass on to my interns;
i want them to see the working world can be fun,
i want them to trust their own ability,
i want them to think, and be sensible about it,
i want them to be intrigued with simple things,
and i want them to know that, it doesn't take a
4.00 cgpa to be succesful in life

a wise old man once told me;
"...it's only natural when you get older,
you would wanna pass on your experience
to the younger people, and leave a legacy..."

so here's my advice;
pass on a good experience,
and leave a good legacy behind

it'll be worth it.

philosophy of the day

maru the cat. part of my final 5%

i'm quite amazed at some people who
are so positive and so sunny and
who embrace new people as all friends

the type who welcomes everyone with open arms,
the type who has no pre-conception of others,
the type who isn't judgemental

...and also the type to make friends first,
then weed out who to 'keep' and who to
'get rid of', once they know each other better

i'm not like that.

i go by first impressions,
i go by months of observation,
i go by what my gut feeling tells me

here's how my brain works;
out of all the new people that i meet,
60% of them i hate straightaway,
10% of them i have no reactions to,
10% of them are forgettable,
10% of them i would find intriguing
5% of them i would like,
and 5% i would like to be friends with.

by doing so, i don't go thru the whole process
of opening myself up to everyone first,
before 'weeding' out bad apples later on

so here's my philosophy about new people;
hate everyone first. you might just be
pleasantly surprised with what you'll find later.

common sense. it's part of fasting.

now, skimming thru the local boards,
it amazes me how many people are sooo pissed
about seeing other people eat on the train
during the lovely fasting month

DUDE, they AREN'T moslems!
so why the hell would you wanna get pissed
with others who have no fasting obligation whatsoever?

hey, here's an idea; look away!

dok marah-marah kat oghang yang tak perlu pose,
pastuh dok kate kalu nengok tu menguji iman.
memang la derang tak pose, kate bukan islam.
yang ko dok tak reti nak tahan sket tu nape?
and yang ko dok sebok-sebok nak nengok tu nape?

morons.

winning. that's what united is all about.

another season, another trophy in the bag

new players, same ol' fighting spirit.

'sorry, i forgot' of the day

now here's something;

how funny would it be if the pemegang
cap mohor diraja or whatever his job is,
would have FORGOTTEN to announce pose?

"...kepade rakyat mesia, saye dengan sukacitanye
mengannounce bahawasenye bulan pose sebenonye
da stat SEMALAM, dan anda sume sekarang kene
ganti pose satu hari. segale kesulitan amat dikesali..."

and how funny would it be when he's asked by
the media as to why the announcement was late,
that he would reply in a tone yang tak besalah;

"...erm, we just kinda forgot about it..."

that would really make my month.

jawapan wajib lulus

a thing of the past. if there were plenty of JW's

if only life were full of jawapan wajib

i remember back in school, eventhough
you got stuck with weird questions,
have no fear, because jawapan wajib is here!

run out of ideas to write dalam exam bm?
simply write down '...dan sebagainya...'
run out of things to write in experiments?
simply write down '...ralat paralaks...'
run out of endings to write in your karangan?
simply write down '...rupenye aku bermimpi...'

just when you think jawapan wajib's are gone,
i saw a lady on the news answering a question
as to why she chose a particular brand

she had this blank expression on her face,
and slowly, but surely, she wonderfully said;
'...sebab jenama ni lain daripada yang lain...'

yes. lain daripada yang lain. heheh.
found myself giggling at the tv.
felt as if i was greeting an old friend

see? there's still hope for jawapan wajib yet!

ooo ooo aaa aaa! WTF la kan

cats are waaay cooler. despite looking grumpy.

i hate monkeys

i think they're ugly and annoying.
i think they're fucking hairy and smelly.
plus they make that annoying sound

i have no interest in protecting apes.
i do not care if they go extinct.
and i certainly hate that stupid-ass
theory that humans are descendants of apes

so, imagine my disdain when i watched
that music video of bruno mars
with him dancing with fucking monkeys

i used to like bruno mars,
with his great tunes and everything,
but now i don't. why? he's not bruno mars

he's bruno planet of the fucking apes

word.

a 'matters of the heart' posto,
credit nani, for posting the wonderful status message

people aren't objects.

earned. not bought.

you know what? i beg to differ;
customers are NOT always rite

the ugly side of purchasing things is,
we tend to treat it as just that; things

our mind has gone to; purchase, pay,
get things, things are objects,
objects are mine, i get to do what i want

if you take notice, we allow it to transcend
into the everyday services that we pay for

take ordering food for example,
we have this ugly habit of being rude
and we think it's ok to mistreat waiters

we want them to be super quick,
we want them to be nice to US all the time,
and we want them to NOT make any mistakes

why? because we paid for it.

how sad would it be when one day
we forsake basic humanity and manners,
all bcos "...eh, sukati la, aku bayar ape..."

so, whatever your stance on the issue,
the customer is NOT always right,
regardless whether they've paid a zillion bucks

omg.otw.lol.

yup. this is how 'otw' looks like.

here's the thing, i always wonder
why do we like saying 'otw!'
when we're actually NOT?

situation : we're supposed to meet
our fwen at, say, 2 pm

currently : we just woke up.
and it's already 1.35 pm

solution : sms 'otw' to fwen.

you know, in the hope it'll
buy us some time when there isn't any.
just bcos it took ages for us
to wake up and to get our lazy-ass
all showered and ready to go

maybe it's time we just be honest
and sms 'sowy! juz got my lazy-ass up.
will be dere in an hour. you go ahead
and eat / go in the cinema / play game
first, and since i'm late, i won't
harbour any ill feelings if you do so'

...wouldn't THAT be just magic? LOL

'we know it's silly, but let's just ask anyway' of the day

money. just checking whether you'd like to have some.

off a tv ad from colgate, it shows a guy
in a really white suit asking a passer-by lady;

guy in a really white suit : excuse me,
would you like to have whiter teeth?

WAT KINDA OF A STUPID-ASS Q IS DAT?

and why the feck is a dentist running around
in supermarkets asking random people
whether they'd like to have whiter teeth?
tade customer ek kat klinik gigi ko tu?

hmmmph.

seandainya bila ku bisa memilih...

another lyrical posto, this time off
the fantastic 'demi waktu' from ungu 8-)

it isn't rocket science ok.

to certain designers and airline bosses, it fits.

now, caltex has this pretty good slogan,
which kinda goes something along the lines of,
"...we know, cos we're drivers too!..."

or something like that.

anyway, i think it's a great slogan,
because it demonstrates the caltex people
as being the 'customers' as well

you know, products for customers BY customers

i wonder if the food department at MAS
are people who actually get on the flites.
my logic tells me that if they DO,
it's quite likely they would've been served
their meal in this ridiculous and shit stupid meal box

who the hell designs AND approves a meal box
with that stupid paper strap / belt / whatever it is,
and takes FOREVER for people to attach it back on
after they've finished their darn (overpriced) meal?

it doesn't take a genius to figure out that if
the outer part of your meal box is trapezium-shaped,
then what you should do is, design the friggin strap /
belt / whatever it is, to be shaped THE SAME WAY kan?

ni tak, friggin meal box is trapezium,
and your stupid-ass strap is half trapezium,
half square, half rectangular, half whatever.
see? there isn't even a NAME for that bloody shape!

IT'S LIKE FORCING SQUARES IN ROUND PEGS ok!

they might as well have a slogan for themselves,
something to explain why that stupid-ass box is there;
"...we don't know shapes, that's why we design shit..."

...it boggles the mind

there are days...

when the world washes away, you might find beauty

...when you are so overwhelmed and exhausted,
and you feel as if the whole world is on your shoulders

...when you want to take care of everyone so badly,
that you end up not taking care of yourself

...when you don't want to shirk your responsibilities,
but in doing so, you also help others to grow

...when you realize that at times you have to let go,
and put your trust and faith in others

...when you might find wonderful surprises,
even by letting the world slip away every now and then

salah konsep of the day

there are days when you feel
you would like strangle your friends

today is one of those days for me,
specially after this little conversation;

mua : i'd like 10 bucks for my besdey!

F.M.F.L.S. : (fwen me feel like strangling)
imagine i have given you that 10 bucks ok. like eMoney!

banyak la ko punye eMoney 8-D

and j.k. rowling lived wealthily ever after.

it all ends? yes, it does.

fact; common experiences bring people together

for better or worse, on one hand or the other,
regardless of whether the experience was good or bad,
the fact that we shared something brings us closer

we watched as these cute little fellas grow,
we watched as they brought amazement and fun,
we watched as they soared high up in the skies,
we watched as they played lotsa neat tricks,
we watched as they solved puzzles here and there,
we watched as they forged friendship and kinship,
we watched as they battled monsters and wizards

...and then there was the finale

how we feared for their safety and well-being,
how we felt their unbearable pain and sacrifice,
how we carried the burden of their responsibilities

but then we saw how heroes come from nowhere,
we saw how good will triumph in our darkest hour,
and we saw how friendship and love,
trust and faith, strength and humility,
is the greatest gift for us all

and that, is an experience we all share

we shared it from the 1st movie onwards,
and eventhough it's time to bid farewell,
the wonderful experience might bring us together.

the harry potter franchise. it truly was magic.

'kalu da kantoi tu, terime jela ye' of the day

blogger. a great place to update daily work performance.

happened a little while ago today;

colleague : (walking past my desk) wadya doin?

mua : erm, i'm updating the production performance

colleague : so, you're updating the production performance
on a website called blogger?

kalu cakap cam berok and gile harte, baru lojik

cicakman. cite mayu yang tade unsur rampas rete oghang.
patut pun cite tu tak lojik.

what is it with malay people?

we love to watch hollywood and bollywood flicks,
we find amazement in the transformers
and the harry potter movie franchise

...and yet kalu cite tu oghang mayu buat,
mesti teruih kite kate mendealah tu tak lojik

sebagai contoh, kalu tengok cite trensfomer mayu,
mesti kite kate mende cam;
"...weh, maneleh kete jadi robot doh,
tak lojik weh, mesti JPJ da saman sume tu doh,
tak lojik lansong doh cite nih..."

pastuh kalu tengok cite heri poter mayu,
mesti kite kate mende cam;
"...weh, manede oghang bleh terbang sane-sini,
antu raye je bleh, pastu naper nak gune magic?
tak reti bace surah yasin ke? tak lojik doh..."

ha tengok? the only things yang lojik
untuk oghang mayu is when cite tu
melibatkan oghang yang cakap cam berok
pastuh sume oghang mayu kaye-raye,
pakai jeket walaupun tengah panas terik,
pastuh sume oghang nak rampas harte
and kompeni masing-masing

sume oghang dok pakai bmw ngan mercedes,
pastuh pakai jeket tengah panas terik.
tu baru tak lojik doh.

get with the programme, bloody beijing!

sempoa. better than excel.

now, we have a new intern,
a local kid, going for internship here
while he's on his semester break

he studies in china

yes. he studies in friggin china.
as if kat situ je ade skolah ok.
as if mesia ni punye la beso cam tade skolah je

and he studies engineering.
in chinese. which means he doesn't
understand a thing we're teaching him,
cause we're teaching him in english,
you know, the language that EVERYONE ELSE uses

and to top things off, he can't use excel.
because in friggin china they use something else.
which is probably made in china.

and is used by china people. only.

so, why the fuck aren't you doing
your fucking internship in fucking china then?
get with programme man, sheesh.

(airline) incident of the day

priority seats. great for people who aren't even THERE.

this happened to me a few weeks ago

while waiting at the departure hall,
i was asked this by the darn person
who clearly wanted to boot me out;

"...excuse me sir, but you're sitting on
the priority seats. it's only for families,
little kids traveling alone, and for people
who are handicapped or the elderly..."

so lemme get this straight, you want me
to get out of the priority seats eventhough
the friggin departure hall is FULL
and they are NO OTHER seats left,
AND they are NO friggin families,
NO friggin little kids travelling alone,
NO friggin handicapped or friggin elderly people?

wat the feck is that all about?

so i go with this;

"...oh, i'd like to be prioritized please,
that's why i'm sitting here..."

end of story.